on We Heart It.
I love wearing bright colors,
and I love things that sparkle,
I laugh at everything,
and I smile more than most,
but darling believe me,
my mind is killing me.
I think it’s really fucked up how so many teenagers are alone and sad and having panic attacks in their room while their parents watch TV, and how a lot of those teenagers have had relatively normal childhoods, yet there’s this huge boom of depression and mental disorders, and its just dumb how we’ve turned into a generation labeled ‘reckless’ but really, we’re only reckless with ourselves
STOP TELLING ME I’M FINE
I’m so fucking suicidal right now aha
Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 Truths about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.
WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. Last beverage: water
2. Last phone call: Caelen
3. Last text message: Caelen
4. Last song you listened to: Degausser by Brand New
5. Last time you cried: Week ago maybe idk.
HAVE YOU EVER:
6. Dated someone twice: yes
7. Been cheated on: Not that I know of
8. Kissed someone and regretted it: yes
9. Lost someone special: yes
10. Been depressed: yes
11. Been drunk and threw up: neither.
LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
Grey, black, purple
IN THE LAST YEAR, HAVE YOU:
15. Made a new friend: Yes
16. Fallen out of love: Yes, thankfully. And fallen in as well.
17. Laughed until you cried: Yup
18: Met someone who changed you: :) Yes <3
19. Found out who your true friends are: Not really
20. Found out someone was talking about you: Unfortunately
21. Kissed anyone on your FB friend’s list: Yeah! :)
22. How many people on your FB friends list do you know in real life: 99.9% (all but 1)
23. Do you have any pets: Yup, a dog named Toula.
24. Do you want to change your name: Eh, Amanda is okay. AGD would be cooler initials though.
25. What did you do for your last birthday: Had a rad gathering and played board games
26. What time did you wake up today: 6:00
27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Texting Caelen and watching Mama Mia!
28. Name something you CANNOT wait for: Saturday
29. Last time you saw your Mother: 5 hours ago
30. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: The way I present myself and perceive things.
31. What are you listening to right now: La Dispute :)
32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yepp
33. What is getting on your nerves right now: Myself/Thoughts
34. Most visited webpage: definitely tumblr
35. Blood type: Not sure :/
36. Nickname: Manda, Mandy, Manders.
37. Relationship status: Happily taken xxx
38. Zodiac sign: Pisces
39. Pronouns: she/her
40. Elementary: PCS
41. High School: wrhs
42. College: N/A
43. Hair color: Dirty blonde
44: Long or Short: Medium?
45. Height: 5’2.5
46. Do you have a crush on someone: Mmhmm<3
47. What do you like about yourself: How trustworthy I am (I guess?)
48. Tattoos: No x
49. Righty or lefty: righty
50. First surgery: I don’t think I’ve ever needed surgery
51. First piercing: ears
52. First best friend: Jilly
53. First sport you joined: soccer
54. First vacation: Disney in 2002
55. First pair of trainers: I dunno
56. Eating: Nothing
57. Drinking: Water
58. I’m about to: Skype Caelen
59. Listening to: ADTR
60. Waiting for: Saturday
61. Want kids: 2, 3 max. (definitely 1 boy 1 girl)
62. Get married: Yes please.
63. Career: Psychologist
WHICH IS BETTER:
64. Lips or eyes: Eyes :)
65. Hugs or kisses: Both!
66. Shorter or taller: taller
67. Older or younger: older
68. Romantic or spontaneous: Both :3
69. Nice stomach or nice arms: Strong arms for nice cuddles<3
70. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive
71. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship <3
72. Trouble maker or hesitant: Hmm. Mixture I suppose
HAVE YOU EVER:
73. Kissed a stranger: Yes
74. Drank hard liquor: Maybe?
75. Lost glasses/contacts: Nope
76. Sex on first date: Noooo
77. Broke someone’s heart: I think so?. .
78. Had your own heart broken: Yes.
79. Been arrested: Nope
80. Turned someone down: Yep
81. Cried when someone died: no
82. Fallen for a friend: yes
83. Did something you weren’t supposed to do: Often yeah
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
84. Yourself: *laughs* No
85. Miracles: Yeah
86. Love at first sight: Yes
87. Heaven: No
88. Santa Claus: No.
89. Kiss on the first date: Yes!
90. Angels: Not really angels but spirits
91. Aliens: No
92. God: No
(Tag 25 people)
yeah sorry 25 people is way too many.
"where were you yesterday?"
"home, contemplating whether i should hang myself or take in a bottle of sleeping pills"
“thats not funny”
who said i was joking
1. Grow up and get over it
2. Honestly you think you have a problem but you don’t
3. I felt worse
4. You don’t look like it so whatever
5. You don’t have real problems
6. You’re fine
7. Oh YOU have it bad? What about ME
8. Am I not good enough
9. Nobody feels sorry for you
10. You just want a reaction
10 things Individual people said to me through the course of 2 years. I was diagnosed with severe depression a few months ago, I cannot control it. This is not an emotion. This is not what you say to someone suffering. This should not be anyone’s reaction to this, especially if it’s chemical. (via epicrainbowtrees)